@TheOnion but wait, you are going to wait till we die...OK then, good luck, witless youngsters
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@TheOnion What if we decide not to die?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion I missed out on cheap health care stock, so I bought stock in SCI funeral services 15 years ago. It's gone up 440% since!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Congratulations to the Chicago Blackhawks on winning the Stanley Cup!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Another $200 trillion in life prolonging products and schemes and another $200 in cryogenic activities.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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“
@TheOnion: Report: Burying, Cremating Baby Boomers To Generate $200 Trillion In GDP http://onion.com/1GL9RQv pic.twitter.com/ni1mVdwWw2”



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@TheOnion Now that's something to think about.#imaboomerThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion stupid BoomersThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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