@TheOnion @MikeUsinger Why wait until you're a senior?
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@TheOnion Another way to sharpen your mind: estimating how long it takes to turn into dust once you're dead. STAYING ALIVE!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Nothing keeps the grim reaper away better than messaging him on MySpace.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion didn't even read it but laughed. That title!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion The Onion tries to remain relevant by stealing from old Mad MagazinesThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Master your fear and let death be a surprise. There are much more pleasant things to think about, than contemplating death.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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“
@TheOnion: Senior Citizen Keeps Mind Active By Contemplating Death http://onion.com/1yjjT9J pic.twitter.com/cgBR4bkeMo”@David_Macaskill
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