Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 24 Jan 2015

    Top Story: Postal Service Unveils New Line Of Stamps Honoring Americans Who Still Use Postal Servicehttp://onion.com/1wt0jjB 

    2:30 PM - 24 Jan 2015
    • 330 Retweets
    • 328 Likes
    • Kara Freewind Ryan♌︎ Brad Coyle Courtney Lovett Kristin Geo Jeremy Stanley Rynestien Matt Lynn
    17 replies 330 retweets 328 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Robyn‏ @LegaLess 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Me. “@TheOnion: Top Story: Postal Service Unveils New Line Of Stamps Honoring Americans Who Still Use Postal Service http://onion.com/1wt0jjB ”

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. _brittybum‏ @_brittybum 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @LegaLess

        @LegaLess my fave snail mailer

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Thomas Ben Brown‏ @ThomasBenBrown 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @BethanyWKRN Bahahahaha

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Kevin Aprile‏ @KevinAprileCT 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Post office jokes are more outdated than the post office.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Launa  🇺🇸 🇺🇸‏ @launa_usa 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I thought that the rule was the person pictured cannot be living; deceased. I'd freak out if I was on a stamp. Bad omen.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Philosopher King (beta version)‏ @signalborder 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Where's my grandmother? I don't see my Nana!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Janel Hulbert‏ @LykkeligKvinde 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion might not be a bad marketing idea! I would buy stamps with my face on them! Take note #USPS

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Hopeful Preacher‏ @RedeemedTony 25 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @ImusZero Both of them?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. fug‏ @merlinfoop 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion the postal service is awesome for when you want to send a long message, because we all know that long texts are really weird.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Kathy Bell‏ @KathyBell19 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Sometimes I wish what you said was true. It would be a better world for us all.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. douglas boutlier‏ @dboutlier 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion sinking the USPS putting Gates in charge of selecting stamps..bull crap it is

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Shadyrock‏ @ShadyrockSports 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Some bills are better off pd by the USP.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Bernhard Luecke‏ @Luecke_Bernhard 24 Jan 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion lol!!!!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info