“@TheOnion: In Focus | Study: Women Always Answer Their Phones Unless... http://onion.com/1u5pIPF ” I laughed too much at this!
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FYI “
@TheOnion: In Focus | Study: Women Always Answer Their Phones Unless They're Having Great Sex With Someone Else http://onion.com/1u5pIPF ”Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion @ChessNLegos "had used up their battery's power sending pictures of their naked body to another man." I'M SO GLAD I READ THIS.


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@shayanara@TheOnion @ChessNLegos LMFAO


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@TheOnion @ChessNLegos "being sexually pleasured by a man superior to the caller in terms of looks, genital endowment, and stamina." LMAAOOOThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion @ChessNLegos "completely consumed by the vaginal gratification they were currently receiving." HAHAHAHAHAHAThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Ladies go from this
to this 



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@TheOnion because I now had love hearts in my eyes
for a superior specimen who knows how to treat women.
Strut like a bull sweetheart.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion I say my ex. Well... then he got bugged so fucks me like a boss!
Exes, don't hate because you fucked up and can't get back.
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@TheOnion Anyone surprised??Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion so true in my case. Broke up with someone who kept calling wanting me back. Nope. Moved on. Next guy says who's that keeps callingThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion selective mult itaskers indeedThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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