Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 10 Jun 2014

    Desperate Barnes & Noble To Give Unlimited Free Tablets To Anyone Who Walks In Store http://onion.com/1kMGCSS pic.twitter.com/dbDBaxjcyN

    9:44 AM - 10 Jun 2014
    • 265 Retweets
    • 272 Likes
    • John Moose DemocracyWatch USA Chad Williams Kenny Coble • コーブル健 Nick Jarvis Marta Jewson Tyler Kunkel Devil BUILT FROM HUMAN PARTS patreon.com/acdpcomics
    18 replies 265 retweets 272 likes
      1. mike‏ @thepaulshark 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "@TheOnion Desperate Barnes & Noble To Give Unlimited Free Tablets To Anyone Who Walks In Store http://onion.com/1kMGCSS " @jordsmithxyz

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. KBCM‏ @katlynbethcm 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Desperate Barnes & Noble To Give... http://onion.com/1kMGCSS  pic.twitter.com/NIxeqIc3ny” @RomanLCMartinez

        This media may contain sensitive material. Learn more
        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. SportSXMichelle‏ @SportSXMichelle 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @RDNHL I like books!

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Katy Milligan‏ @KatyMilligan90 11 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Desperate Barnes & Noble To Give Unlimited Free Tablets To Anyone http://onion.com/1kMGCSS  pic.twitter.com/wNjl5HaNQN” @healthyrx

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Ano Lobb‏ @AnoLobb 11 Jun 2014
        Replying to @KatyMilligan90

        @KatyMilligan90 alas, I'm not sure you could even give away a Nook. Someone left one at my house & won't take it back.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. McVladie‏ @McVladie 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @derekf03 Spokesperson for Barnes and Nobles says they have NEVER heard of this.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Bruno Haché‏ @BrunoHache 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @Lissa_Price good old Onion.. never disappoints me. what's next? @chaptersindigo giving out Kobo's :-P

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1.  🎥 🎱Tony Floyd 🎨 ☯‏ @TheRevAAF 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion a Well, I've got my nook but where will I get my cranny?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Bailey Evans‏ @BaileyPolzin 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I want one too !

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Kendra‏ @krookidK 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion this is so sad.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. rhett is my gentleman friend, yes‏ @brokenpencil__ 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion The replies alone made my day.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. jwoll‏ @hockey_poppa 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion including the dad from The Wonder Years?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Gregor Schmidt‏ @gregorspeaks 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Wonder how many you need before you can trade up to an #iPad?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. TD‏ @_T__D_ 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Desperate Barnes & Noble To Give Unlimited Free Tablets To Anyone Who Walks In Store http://onion.com/1kMGCSS " @peggymasters KDH?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Saltines for Dinner‏ @SaltyMcBrine 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion "No thanks, I have a kindle. I was just getting a Mocha Flubbercino."

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Brette Querzoli‏ @BretteQ 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion that looks like Robert De Niro

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Likely Blair‏ @BlairLikely 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion what I want one how????

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Catherine Antuono‏ @Cantuono 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Do you have to buy anythig?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Miguel Esquirol‏ @miguelesquirol 10 Jun 2014
        Replying to @Cantuono

        @Cantuono @TheOnion You don't need to buy anything at all... is free

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info