Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 17 Apr 2014

    Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hourhttp://onion.com/1nsEkqI 

    10:38 AM - 17 Apr 2014
    • 212 Retweets
    • 214 Likes
    • Alma Burt Megan Brazeau Nathan Dalton Jen McGowan Rob Hix Jaqi Cohen Richard B. Miller Oscar Haselden, Jr. Jack Richardson
    16 replies 212 retweets 214 likes
      1. ben busche‏ @Ben_Busche 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” @director_hb @RMillz77

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Caity Kerr‏ @Ckerr9 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @NicciRichmond

        @NicciRichmond @TheOnion clearly his outside food senses are lacking

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Micah Manning‏ @MicahtheManning 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” @BabyJett777

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Austin Jett‏ @BabyJett777 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @MicahtheManning

        @MicahtheManning hahaha that about sums it up

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Kenny Delgado‏ @KennyDelgadoS 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” @brendonbigley @Marxelle

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ronan McNamee‏ @roadsouth 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” @hjames

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. mark saleby‏ @heero99 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion ..thus avoiding the short-change artists that populate movie-house snack counters nationwide.#goodforhimIsay

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Deanna‏ @dbochery 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” @raysubers

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Trumpetarian‏ @icapturpix 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Lets pay him $15 dollars an hour & give people free candy! Hmmm that would bankrupt the movie industry... #Socialism doesn't work!

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Chris Adler‏ @adler_chris 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @icapturpix

        @icapturpix @TheOnion lol a libertarian took an onion article seriously #readingdoesntwork

        3 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Trumpetarian‏ @icapturpix 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @adler_chris

        @adler_chris @TheOnion you took my tweet as serious? Hahahaha

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. Juulian‏ @julianbryanb 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ”

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jude Brandon‏ @JudeBrandon 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I think this all o the time

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Anne Wydler‏ @abwVA 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ” I have done it w/latte #starbucks

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Christie Gray‏ @christie_gray_ 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @MitchHogg

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. ChurchChills‏ @ChurchChills 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion 7? I got paid 8.50 for that gig back in college. That teen got ripped off.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Mika Felton‏ @MikaMouse_ 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Story of my life 😂 “@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour http://onion.com/1nsEkqI ”

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Claire Fromme‏ @frommecl 17 Apr 2014
        Replying to @TheOnion

        How bout a burrito, salsa, chips + a 2 liter, @momileur? RT@TheOnion: Moviegoer Manages To Sneak Candy Past Teenage Usher Earning $7 An Hour

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info