Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 25 Mar 2013

    "Hi, In The Past 2 Years, You Have Allowed Me To Kill 70,000 People" | Commentary By Bashar al-Assadhttp://onion.com/15MArCL 

    8:00 PM - 25 Mar 2013
    • 230 Retweets
    • 58 Likes
    • ButterMilk Evan Mather The Anti-Barbie Doll SKULLOMANIA 💀 Bool Saba 🎃your pal friendpatine 🎃 Sohrab Robby Delaware
    15 replies 230 retweets 58 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Dean Ward‏ @WardDino 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion As satirical as an Adam Sandler movie but sadly lacking the intelligence of one of his movies. #tasteless

        3 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Ol' Dirty Thuggery‏ @lemontiter 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @WardDino

        @WardDino @theonion Yes, if only this had the wit and brevity of Grown Ups, or Jack and Jill.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Partisangirl  🇸🇾‏Verified account @Partisangirl 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Lame, not even funny bad attempt at propaganda

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. RioFender‏ @JohnRiofender 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @Partisangirl

        @Partisangirl @theonion do you think Partisangirl might be pro-Assad?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Partisangirl  🇸🇾‏Verified account @Partisangirl 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @JohnRiofender

        @JohnRiofender @TheOnion No just anti the lies and stupidity that are destroying my country, Most of the Dead are Soldiers and Insurgents

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. RioFender‏ @JohnRiofender 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @Partisangirl

        @Partisangirl @theonion you do know that The Onion is a satirical news site yeah?!

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Partisangirl  🇸🇾‏Verified account @Partisangirl 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @JohnRiofender

        @JohnRiofender @TheOnion Yes & Satire is a political tool. "I have killed thousands no one can stop me", it's not even a joke, just pathetic

        0 replies 1 retweet 0 likes
      7. End of conversation
      1. Dickweed Specklebum...... (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻‏ @mindterrorist 30 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        .@TheOnion Holy crap, this satire is based on way too many falsehoods to mention in 140characters. Onion, you are usually better than this!

        0 replies 1 retweet 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. John 'Matt' Overwine‏ @overwine 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Well played. I love it when you guys get serious.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Tom Egnoto‏ @tomegnoto 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion this is pretty dark for satire....

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Johnny‏ @_JohnnyKelly 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion really onion? REALLY?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. DANZO‏ @gerardojuarez10 27 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion fuck this shit

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. jamesking‏ @runningman2u 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Is this for real??? Woww!!??

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Rayan Ammar‏ @rayanammar07 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: "Hi, In The Past 2 Years, You Have Allowed Me To Kill 70,000 People" | Commentary By Bashar al-Assad http://onion.com/15MArCL ”

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Nick‏ @N7LeadFarmer 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion this is such hypocricy. BO & US haven't intervened b/c he's not overstepping the UN, the very thing you used to crucify Bush 2 for

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Joe Sanders‏ @joesanders33 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion yet, if the us did, say, remove an oppressive murderous dictator, the onion would scream and howl about us policing the world

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Partisangirl  🇸🇾‏Verified account @Partisangirl 26 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Garbage in the last two years NATO has been allowed to Destroy and murder Syrians by sending weapons to insurgents.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. rickenbacken‏ @Rickenbacken 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion great way to get your point across. This is what satire is all about: showing the atrocities of what has been done.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. The Anti-Barbie Doll‏ @polyhumorous 25 Mar 2013
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion You had a Smokey the Bear ad at the end of this article. He should be saying "Only You Can Prevent Genocide."

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info