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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 12 Nov 2012

    “I've never had sex, I'm not having sex now, and I guarantee I'll never have sex in the future." – Interim CIA Directorhttp://onion.com/TBOZhl 

    3:17 PM - 12 Nov 2012
    • 503 Retweets
    • 117 Likes
    • breacher18 NW Brooklyn News&Fun Woodro Dro Nick Jennifer Lee Hallsey Dan Adamsky Lauren Tara LaCapra mike David X
    27 replies 503 retweets 117 likes
      1. Rebecca Dodson‏ @BeckyDodson924 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion giggle

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Karen Bou Karam‏ @Kboukaram 27 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @iJesseWilliams

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Bridget Waldron‏ @bswaldron 13 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @iJesseWilliams O_O

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Ponder On That‏ @PonderOnThat 13 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion hilarious!! Did he really say that? Did Tim Tebow switch professions?? LOL

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Bill Stanford‏ @fauxcredo 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @theonion Give the Boss job at the CIA to Ollie North, he will know what to do!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Andy perez‏ @Bkzrealist 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I believe it

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Dolly Peterson‏ @peterson_dolly 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion never say never! Without sex? Another strange imbalance personality.....so creepy.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Keneisha Duncan‏ @consultiamkd 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I truly feel for u. U must be living one SAD life. #BeHonest

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. tallatt‏ @tallatt67 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion "solely for excreting urine". Not likely.One he's human. Second he's a guy.Third what is he doing instead? Just sayin

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Dave-El‏ @DayWayLo 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Wow! I too could be CIA director!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Mathew Conners‏ @MathewConners1 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Why not?! It's awesome

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Chas Veronick‏ @cjveronick 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I am not Bill Clinton! And i do know what is is!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1.  ❌ 🇨🇦CANADIAN INFIDEL 🇨🇦 ❌‏ @PissedOffAnglo 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion k,just read that again.....still laughing!! You guys are good!!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Ti‏ @N0tUserFriendly 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion This is a recipe for disaster. Too much pent up frustration.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Tom W‏ @theTGW 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion " I am not gay, have never been gay...." yep sounds familiar.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. CocciaStella‏ @CocciaStella 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Yikes!! Weirdest admission I've ever heard. This guy sound really scary I hope he was being facetious.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Tom W‏ @theTGW 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion We're def safe now!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Leandro Ros‏ @LeandlRos 12 Nov 2012
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @vdelaserna That´s what i call having a clear position on that particular issue but i don´t think he enjoys the decision that much

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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