@TheOnion Masturbation is the primary cause of carpal tunnel.
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion I learned weds bout a study showing a correlation between higher education and increased masturbation. Makes sense now. Bath time.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion so if I had Green Lantern's ring and I masturbated with it on... Whoa.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Who didn't know that?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion this deserves a RT...lolThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@theonion please tell the Onion's twitter guy to stop masturbating. okiedokie then.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Chronic masturbation = Overactive Imagination?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Did our tax payer dollars go towards this study too? -
@scubawillie lulllllzzzzzz
End of conversation
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