Meeting ‘area man’ is now on my bucket list.
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Why meet when you can face time.
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No substitute for personal interaction
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Funny because it’s true.
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I'd like to lose my luggage on a concord but I think that ship has sailed.
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Sugestion
@TheOnion next time do the luggage lost from a 2hr fight from Madrid to Paris...delivered to your hotel the day after you left and customer service only knows at this point the hotel declined to take it...no end yet...it’s a developing story!!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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"Excuse me sir, I believe you stole my wallet."
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Yet virginity left unscathed
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This is why you wear a Fanny pack with your wallet in it :)
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Dog Walker Disapointed Not To Find A Dead Body.
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