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The Onion
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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Aug 10

    Report: 92% Of Divorced Parents Get Back Together If Children Ask Enough Times https://trib.al/vAJmmMe pic.twitter.com/iCzLQ2F8XV

    2:44 PM - 10 Aug 2018
    • 180 Retweets
    • 1,672 Likes
    • Luke 🔜 TwitchCon damn! Ry Damien anka Duhater Roberto Abramowitz Just a broken guy Don't drink the pool water
    24 replies 180 retweets 1,672 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Doesn’t Get Satire/Parody‏ @NoSatireForMe Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I would be interested to see the data in this one. That number seems WAY too high.

        1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes
      3. Israel Barker‏ @_Israel_Barker Aug 10
        Replying to @NoSatireForMe @TheOnion

        Username checks out

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Jeannie‏ @Jeanbo71 Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion @sydneydolores2

        Not likely!

        2 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. Hungray‏ @AwesomeAnies Aug 10
        Replying to @Jeanbo71 @TheOnion @sydneydolores2

        r/atetheonion

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Ryan Jack O’lanterns Ate My Neighbors‏ @Ryknowsnothing Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I guess I’m just one of the damn 8%. And it’s all my fault too.

        1 reply 0 retweets 12 likes
      3. MrGuy‏ @MrGuyGaming Aug 10
        Replying to @Ryknowsnothing @TheOnion

        I think by your fault you mean "you were born and then your parents fought about it"

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. Ryan Jack O’lanterns Ate My Neighbors‏ @Ryknowsnothing Aug 10
        Replying to @MrGuyGaming @TheOnion

        Aww. You’re just saying that.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. MrGuy‏ @MrGuyGaming Aug 10
        Replying to @Ryknowsnothing @TheOnion

        well how is it your fault then

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. End of conversation
      1. Michael Baker‏ @Mikeypb66 Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Well, 2 mommies are better than one...

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. Alex Papamichail‏ @pappadarappa Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        100% of divorced parents get back together if children ask enough times If your parents didn’t get back together, then you didn’t ask enough times

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. cathy‏ @cathyxOR Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Report: 100% of kids who pester parents over and over to get them back together eventually get sent to their rooms.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Andrew Baker‏ @brakerbaker Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Conclusion: 8% of divorced parents haven’t been asked enough times.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Kayne‏ @KayneBrowne Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thank fuck I was in that 8%

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Fred Fredburger‏ @KaBucchi Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Or if they behave better. It’s because of those brats that we spilt up in the first place.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Tantz Aerine‏ @TantzAerine Aug 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        While adults realise this is satirical. young children of divorced parents may not. And when they fail to get them together by asking a thousand times, they will think it's their fault. Just don't play with the notion for the sake of kids' mental health, please.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Charles Bonnar‏ @CBrex617 Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        That explains a lot- i NEVER asked.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. !!Jasmin!!‏ @basminjolanos Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oof..

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Daniel Hatfield‏ @DanTheJapanFan Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        But will they takes us to Mount Splashmore?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Aster Luu‏ @AsterLuu Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hahahahahahhaha

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Passer-Gasbuddy‏ @PasserGasbuddy Aug 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        But I would tell them, " We're not getting back together again if you ask, 'Are we there yet? BEFORE WE ACTUALLY ARE!'! That gives us cover.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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