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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Aug 8

    Scientists Slowly Reintroducing Small Group Of Normal, Well-Adjusted Humans Into Society https://trib.al/5ULBwTn pic.twitter.com/7bZTZYTgZ8

    3:38 PM - 8 Aug 2018
    • 1,064 Retweets
    • 4,657 Likes
    • Bill Linnane Mitra Trevor Lawless Kevin Hanrahan Bookishblondie Jimmer Michael Espersen Kamil Viktor Wolf
    88 replies 1,064 retweets 4,657 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. James‏ @JamesGabsThings Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        When will these start to roll out in my area? Is there a release roadmap?

        1 reply 0 retweets 15 likes
      3. David Golden‏ @davidgolden99 Aug 8
        Replying to @JamesGabsThings @TheOnion

        There was a beta release in my town. It went pretty well.pic.twitter.com/SPotsaylpz

        0 replies 0 retweets 17 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Margaret Sheehan‏ @MargareMSheehan Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They shall be eaten, and quickly, too.

        0 replies 0 retweets 63 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Jack20263‏ @TTCJackP Aug 9
        Replying to @TheOnion @the_loff

        Why is this happening now???

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Jeff‏ @the_loff Aug 9
        Replying to @TTCJackP @TheOnion

        It takes a lot of time to get to permits to farm normal well adjusted people

        1 reply 0 retweets 9 likes
      4. Jack20263‏ @TTCJackP Aug 9
        Replying to @the_loff @TheOnion

        Oh OK typical government red tape they need to streamline the system

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. Derek David‏ @DerekDa93306206 Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Again? This didn’t work in earlier attempts...

        0 replies 0 retweets 21 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. "No Shit" Sherlock‏ @PunishmentHurts Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oh, boy, this won't end well

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Fleet-footed Philosopher‏ @fleetfootphilo Aug 8
        Replying to @PunishmentHurts @TheOnion

        Kinda reminds me of thishttp://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2015/08/innocent-hitchhiking-robot-murdered-by-america.html …

        1 reply 1 retweet 2 likes
      4. "No Shit" Sherlock‏ @PunishmentHurts Aug 8
        Replying to @fleetfootphilo @TheOnion

        Lordy

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. Jess J. Behrens‏ @glibly_jjb Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They won't last a day.

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. moutasem‏ @mutantmo Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They'll be eaten alive out there!

        0 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
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      1. BrotherEJ‏ @Brother3j Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        sure it was scary at first I was like put me back in the cage but they said funding was running out OH WAIT this is the onion I thought it was @DeptVetAffairs sry never mind

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Brandeau‏ @JaredBlaylock2 Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Though, the groups introduced into America very quickly became majorly depressed, developed crippling anxiety and accrued a large amount of debt.

        1 reply 0 retweets 7 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Helaine Eisenberg‏ @heclif Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion @DLHDara

        Too slow

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Erica‏ @foistedallegory Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        will they remember the scientist and run to them with glee when they are reunited years later?

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. cr cook‏ @lovinlifeindy Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Where are they being set loose?

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Zuzu Griffin‏ @Zuzu_writer Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Actually, they've always been among us.pic.twitter.com/HxlzLWKAUU

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Marc-Andre Dion‏ @madfe051 Aug 8
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They'll be eaten alive in a week.

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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