Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Aug 7

    Man Trying To Enter Conversation Spends Few Minutes Smiling And Nodding At Edge Of Circle https://trib.al/aPTLxtE pic.twitter.com/9T4pR99xju

    6:08 PM - 7 Aug 2018
    • 719 Retweets
    • 3,968 Likes
    • Zac Sanjana Shah Nick Kubeck A. S. Peters Ashlyn Heniff Janardhan R AdAm⚔️AwEsOmE Docta Obrochta Sanahssf
    49 replies 719 retweets 3,968 likes
      1. Valley Girl‏ @2ndNextBest Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This hits close to home, Onion.

        0 replies 0 retweets 52 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Nathan Rodriguez‏ @ParagHatzNate Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Slowly backs away upon realizing they’re having a conversation about their fantasy football league.

        0 replies 0 retweets 27 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Norms are a spook‏ @realhnewhouse Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oh hey it's me

        0 replies 0 retweets 33 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ass in Technical Studies‏ @jhoak_ Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I don't remember owning that shirt

        0 replies 0 retweets 18 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. the nyc gritty committee‏ @koreshbandicoot Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I feel attacked

        0 replies 0 retweets 13 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Neil Bakshi‏ @neilbakshi Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Story of my life.

        0 replies 0 retweets 12 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Bugster‏ @mark_viviano6 Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This is actually me

        1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Doug Roling‏ @DougRoling1 Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He's looking for that opening with a clever comment then he will be accepted

        0 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Texas Chainsaw Masen-cre  🎃‏ @dockers_clutch Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Ugh. Way too relatable 😒

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Halfway to Galway‏ @GranularityRUs Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I called that "high school".

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ryan‏ @Ryrigger64 Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I finally made an onion article

        0 replies 1 retweet 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ryan_Dagner‏ @Ryan_Dagner Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        All the conference life folks 👋

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Donnie Weisse‏ @weisse_guy Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @NStekler

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Clayton Tramel‏ @ClaytonTramel Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion finally profiled me!

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Runar Røssevold‏ @raskgut Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hits too deep, man 😪

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Nancy‏ @ninecannons Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Poor Ben.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Theodosus‏ @Atheodosus Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/78ARDq6ZyE

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Authentic Don Holley™‏ @donholley0 Aug 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I was actually eyeballing the prawns and cocktail sauce.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info