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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Aug 6

    Picking Thing Up From Apartment Floor Rescheduled For Thursday https://trib.al/oWDD2yD pic.twitter.com/kOX1wng2Wv

    5:14 PM - 6 Aug 2018
    • 979 Retweets
    • 5,503 Likes
    • ImTheRealDude Odder Kaalimato Guy greengreek Justin reno catherine saunders TES VI: Rhubarb Triangle Umut
    47 replies 979 retweets 5,503 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Polly Sigh‏ @dcpoll Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion @steve_dorsey

        Same.

        1 reply 1 retweet 13 likes
      3.  🍁 🎃 Christi Says SHOW UP AND VOTE!!!!!  🎃 🍁‏ @BayouOwl Aug 6
        Replying to @dcpoll @TheOnion @steve_dorsey

        +1

        1 reply 1 retweet 5 likes
      4. Ginger BlueTsunami Nov6-it’s #MuellerTime‏ @Ginger624 Aug 6
        Replying to @BayouOwl @dcpoll and

        +2

        0 replies 1 retweet 5 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. trundlestumps‏ @bensassymassey Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        It ain’t going nowhere.

        0 replies 0 retweets 19 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Cɾυȥ Dσɳ'ƚ SK8‏ @BrandonDoughan Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        way too close to home

        0 replies 0 retweets 13 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. Tyler Rodino‏ @tylerrodino Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @akshaysongs remember when we did this but it was for 16 months

        0 replies 0 retweets 11 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. ptrevre‏ @ptrevre Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @haleystapes I feel attacked

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. Haley Stapleton‏ @haleystapes Aug 6
        Replying to @ptrevre @TheOnion

        😂😂😂 Luckily when you reschedule it, they are “magically” picked up before the rescheduled date 😉

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      4. ptrevre‏ @ptrevre Aug 6
        Replying to @haleystapes @TheOnion

        Funny how things just work out like that 😉

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Erica‏ @foistedallegory Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        it's easier to find that way

        1 reply 0 retweets 7 likes
      3. Angela Sedai‏ @xavierjacks Aug 6
        Replying to @foistedallegory @TheOnion

        That’s what I say.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. grenAHHH!duck 🦆 🧛‍♂️ 👻‏ @Hereticalmist Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This box has literally been there for 10 months. It's an extra shelf nowpic.twitter.com/0sExOzjVs9

        0 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
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      1. ProcrastinationPartners‏ @ProcrastPartner Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Aiming for Thursday, but it’s more of a stretch goal.

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. Hannah Mott‏ @TheEverydayMath Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion @BassForever20XX

        Are you me?

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. JK‏ @jocinneide Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I just set an alarm...problem solved

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Tom‏ @cardinalsquared Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I laughed heartily at this article while looking at the wine glass on my floor from Friday night.

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Bill‏ @BillJitsu Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I just keep walking on top of stuff until it becomes a part of the floor.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Jess J. Behrens‏ @glibly_jjb Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "Look, if she really wants it done, she could pick it up just as easy."

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Jess J. Behrens‏ @glibly_jjb Aug 6
        Replying to @glibly_jjb @TheOnion

        "I like it there. Very Feng Shui."

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Chris V.‏ @chrisvt Aug 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Which Thursday?

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. Deimos‏ @MusingsOfDeimos Aug 6
        Replying to @chrisvt @TheOnion

        #Loophole

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation

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