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The Onion
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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Jul 23

    Disgusted Researchers Can’t Even Bring Themselves To Find Out How Much Mayo The Average American Consumes Yearly https://trib.al/ULJaAsx pic.twitter.com/mWf9tbmrQP

    7:26 AM - 23 Jul 2018
    • 262 Retweets
    • 1,769 Likes
    • Nick ☁️YANAN DAY☁️ Spooky Climate Collapse 🌹 Ed Truzz abbyween G Money alex m (be nice to eachother pls) Molly Peterson mira🍒🌻
    24 replies 262 retweets 1,769 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Vik‏ @beamishboye Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Maybe, but that's why the capable researchers at @UberFacts figured out how much beer gets stuck in peoples beards every year.pic.twitter.com/GDDJpYktrj

        1 reply 1 retweet 2 likes
      3. DeanLogic  ♎‏ @DeanLogic Jul 23
        Replying to @beamishboye @TheOnion @UberFacts

        This is horrifying.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Ghost Housekeeper‏ @brendangetzell Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Congrats to Chuck on his new gig

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Paul Sie1ski‏ @thebigpeezy Jul 23
        Replying to @brendangetzell @TheOnion

        I hear too much mayo makes you shit on the floor.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Prince Prince‏ @PrinceAizy Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I LOVE mayo

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Tony Dotta‏ @TonyDotta Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion @mattdotta1

        heres my data. 1 jar a week! ive really cut back though in recent months. use to have a 3 jar a week habit.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Lukas Hafeli‏ @LukasHafeli Jul 23
        Replying to @TonyDotta @TheOnion @mattdotta1

        Tony! 3 a week?? Are you eating it with a spoon? Don’t get me wrong, I like mayonnaise but...🤢

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Tony Dotta‏ @TonyDotta Jul 23
        Replying to @LukasHafeli @TheOnion @mattdotta1

        i gave up using a spoon. just use my hands.

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      5. Lukas Hafeli‏ @LukasHafeli Jul 23
        Replying to @TonyDotta

        At the missions spaghetti dinner yesterday after church, Jesse was all excited because he made brownies with mayo as he had ran out of oil.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Tony Dotta‏ @TonyDotta Jul 23
        Replying to @LukasHafeli

        great minds think alike. its just eggs and oil anyway.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. Lukas Hafeli‏ @LukasHafeli Jul 23
        Replying to @TonyDotta

        And they tasted really good.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      8. End of conversation
      1. Paul Farrington-Douglas‏ @Bridge_DepEd Jul 24
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I dreamt that I was at a party and went to the fridge to get mayo. The guests looked disgusted at the huge bottle. "Oh dear," I thought. "They think I'm going to do something weird. I'll let them see I just need a little." So I filled a bowl and started eating it with a spoon...

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Charles Bonnar‏ @CBrex617 Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Still hoping to get the 5gallon “bible belt“ jar up in MA. stuck buying just the 5pounder and i have to get four!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Ghirahim‏ @ThaDemonLord Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What else are you supposed to spread on your sandwich?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Paul Farrington-Douglas‏ @Bridge_DepEd Jul 24
        Replying to @ThaDemonLord @TheOnion

        Lard.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Susannah Thane Stout‏ @sugahcookie83 Jul 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        If they saw my mother-in-law's recipe for potato salad, they would faint 😳😂

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. ViewtfulHero‏ @ViewtfulHero Jul 23
        Replying to @sugahcookie83 @TheOnion

        She puts mustard and egg yolks in it?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Susannah Thane Stout‏ @sugahcookie83 Jul 23
        Replying to @ViewtfulHero @TheOnion

        Sooooo much mayo 😰

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. ViewtfulHero‏ @ViewtfulHero Jul 23
        Replying to @sugahcookie83 @TheOnion

        Oh that's even worse.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. End of conversation

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