Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Jul 12

    For the 30th anniversary of the film's release, 'The Onion' looks back at 'Die Hard.'pic.twitter.com/d8FeK5hnZl

    10:51 AM - 12 Jul 2018
    • 94 Retweets
    • 348 Likes
    • Caitlin the Mage josh Gina Allegre Camden Itayeldad Luis Piedrabuena Murph In Tampa That one random guy Michael Shields
    18 replies 94 retweets 348 likes
      1. Kerri W Official‏ @klwally Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Best Christmas Movie Ever. #DieHardChristmas

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Hogan Chen‏ @les_desechables Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Instead of planning for next years christmas party, they should have been planning for a one week turnaround for a new years party. The employees don't deserve to wait a whole year!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. couchtripper‏ @couchtripper Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The most important lesson from that movie is that scrunching your toes on plush carpet is, in fact, the best thing ever.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Ruairi O'Hagan‏ @Haganator Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @yenoom64 @MickRing83 yes.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. alan mooney‏ @yenoom64 Jul 12
        Replying to @Haganator @TheOnion @MickRing83

        you should organise a festival

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. Ruairi O'Hagan‏ @Haganator Jul 12
        Replying to @yenoom64 @TheOnion @MickRing83

        No you should organise a festival

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. alan mooney‏ @yenoom64 Jul 12
        Replying to @Haganator @TheOnion @MickRing83

        Fine I will... It will Have die hard..black jack... And hookers.... .

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Mick Ring  🇮🇪‏ @MickRing83 Jul 12
        Replying to @yenoom64 @Haganator @TheOnion

        Will ellis be there?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. alan mooney‏ @yenoom64 Jul 12
        Replying to @MickRing83 @Haganator @TheOnion

        who do you think is bringing the hookers

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      8. End of conversation
      1. Cory W‏ @agent3881 Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @MFeRock @jzwack

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Chris Barton‏ @oklamediacritic Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        karaoke is overrated at these parties

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Dave‏ @CineMarkTheater Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion @gethtj_jones

        Christmas in July. Awesome.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. byronaaugust‏ @byronaaugust Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Yippee Ki Yay m**f**rs!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Wayne Turner‏ @MulliganMullet Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Unfortunately, Holly missed out the following year, she was stuck in a plane...

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. ViewtfulHero‏ @ViewtfulHero Jul 12
        Replying to @MulliganMullet @TheOnion

        Hey at least she wasn't written out like in Vengeance, Live Free, and the last one.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. leto‏ @john_alot Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Always baffled me HOW this ever became an Xmas movie to shown once a year along with It's a wonderful life, White Christmas, Scrooge ETC, the song is about the only Christmassy thing about it. It's a good film thou.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Matthew Coussell‏ @MatthewCoussell Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OO5kok46mzc …

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. ن Just Chris‏ @crkleffner Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        #neverforgetNakatomiXmas

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. James‏ @jamesdiscourse Jul 12
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/JsOVon9it7

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. James‏ @jamesdiscourse Jul 12
        Replying to @jamesdiscourse @TheOnion

        He hates LA.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info