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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Jul 9

    Man Running Toward Departing Train Must Have Finally Realized He Loves Her https://trib.al/F4un1uE pic.twitter.com/YllNHzFdKw

    5:15 AM - 9 Jul 2018
    • 233 Retweets
    • 2,023 Likes
    • MuzzDOT Michael Foucault 𝘈 🗡 T.Aubrey Barbara Jones RIP Karen Phil E Pierre-Simon Laplace steely dan
    19 replies 233 retweets 2,023 likes
      1. Sanju‏ @Only1_Sanjeev Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Nice movie plot. Why nobody ever thought about it?

        0 replies 0 retweets 11 likes
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      1. Jess‏ @JessStewart07 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Yeah, but the train deserves better. #Runawaytrain #boybye

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Ben Williams‏ @BWilliams1901 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Or does not want to be late for work.

        0 replies 1 retweet 1 like
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      1. Henry Mwawasi‏ @hmjune81 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        There is still plenty of time for him to rush to the airport to stop her from taking that dream job in Paris

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Dirk‏ @kalvinbal Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What, the train is female?

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. boingboingbbeep‏ @boingboingbbeep Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Left my weed on the train!

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Ken van horn‏ @Kenvanhorn2 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        No he realized she's bat shit crazy and trying to get the hell away from her.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. eric ½  🐝‏ @PSeigh Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        She won’t get far - it’s the CTA.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Sarah Hunter‏ @Sarah1995Hunter Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        After a long research, I decided to invest in @DeepOnion. I feel a big spike in the next months. $ONION at $100 soon. Mark my words! #DeepOnion @deeponionx

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Alex Preiss‏ @AlexPreiss4 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Dustin & and his non local friend left the train station for some fancy food at White Castle.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Tommy McPines‏ @TMcpines Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        She has the coffee

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Deatheater Mullen‏ @DeatheaterMull1 Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He shouldn't sweat it... Ive been sleighin her for months...

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Vavrmon Updates‏ @Snovvy_alt Jul 9
        Replying to @DeatheaterMull1 @TheOnion

        i didnt it was christmas.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Mandaliet‏ @teiladnam Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        How does he know this is the final realization? It's likely if he ends up with her he'll continue to have doubts. I guess what I'm saying is: Romantic comedies are dumb.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Aasiya Pandith‏ @aasiyapandith Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        So #Bollywood 😄😄

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. KushK‏ @RationalBeing Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        😁😁😃😃😆😆😁😁

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. AW‏ @AndrewWeeraratn Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He was trying to be cool, thinking she was bluffing until the last minute.... and train left

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. HM‏ @HMyrland Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Area man trying to prove that future ex wife can be trained...

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. The Automated Automation Engineer‏ @F_Stromberg Jul 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Or possibly realized he forgot his briefcase. One or the other.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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