Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Jul 6

    Family Watching Movie White-Knuckles It Through Unexpected Sex Scene https://trib.al/aNp5akk pic.twitter.com/LwPNwMWpry

    8:18 PM - 6 Jul 2018
    • 1,050 Retweets
    • 7,008 Likes
    • Alaina Smith Tom 📷 Nancy D Maren Scott hi manic-nomadic Michael Foucault Kat🚶
    71 replies 1,050 retweets 7,008 likes
      1. Sam Palasota‏ @SamPalasota Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "I thought Boogie Nights was about dancing" - Dad

        0 replies 2 retweets 55 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Prince Techno‏ @Geek_Prince Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Lol the boy pretending to be just as grossed out by secretly he's happy he gets to see 7 seconds or bare boobage. Now he's gonna watch that movie every night when everyone goes to bed

        1 reply 0 retweets 69 likes
      3. Cory Marler‏ @ReverendCory Jul 7
        Replying to @Geek_Prince @TheOnion

        This was me with titanic and starship troopers

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Butch Richard‏ @ButchRichard Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Happens all the time. Euro trip was latest. I usually break the ice with a killer dad joke.

        2 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
      3. Scaremy Troia‏ @jeremy_troia Jul 6
        Replying to @ButchRichard @TheOnion

        Quality move, Butch.

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Derek Sanft‏ @ddsanft Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The struggle is real.

        0 replies 0 retweets 18 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Michael Wense‏ @mwense Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        My childhood.

        0 replies 0 retweets 17 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Steve‏ @podesta9 Jul 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I watched team America with my grandma when it came out and thankfully she was sleeping through the puppet sex scene

        1 reply 0 retweets 8 likes
      3. Kitty Hootz‏ @DrKittyHootz Jul 7
        Replying to @podesta9 @TheOnion

        LOL! Watched Team America with my teenage kids. Excruciating!😳

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. marie  💜 [semi-active bc i'm a busy & tired bitch]‏ @Maricey912 Jul 7
        Replying to @RensGem @TheOnion

        Ahhhh YES!!! Lol

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Panama‏ @11_Panama_ Jul 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Anyone remembers trying to catch nudity through scrambled TV signals in their youth? Asking for a friend.

        2 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      3. Angela‏ @madcatdisease Jul 7
        Replying to @11_Panama_ @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/fUYJ8hPKlK

        1 reply 1 retweet 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Brittany‏ @SpreadDaWingz Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        lool this is all too real...I hate when I forget a show or movie I want to show family has these drawn out sex scenes

        0 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. T'Challa N'Jakada Shuri Jr.‏ @AngryOroro Jul 6
        Replying to @TheOnion @mikedubsfilm

        The Blockbuster Agenda.....Why must we be privy to such immorality?pic.twitter.com/cRPpd8RXUv

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Michael Lanna‏ @Micklanna Jul 7
        Replying to @TheOnion @RodneyClaeys

        Wow, The Onion is getting desperate for stories these days !

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Rodney"Reciprocity”Claeys Vote November 6  🌊‏ @RodneyClaeys Jul 7
        Replying to @Micklanna @TheOnion

        Yeah, maybe they should start making things up.😊

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. Michael Lanna‏ @Micklanna Jul 7
        Replying to @RodneyClaeys @TheOnion

        Actually I did laugh at that pic of the family watching the movie, the Mother sitting there with her legs crossed like she was fending off the television lol

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Gordon Derry‏ @Rockster001 Jul 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Been there! I grew up in a time before remote controls. When this happened, all eyes would hit the floor and Dad would yell, "OK, BED!" and we'd scamper off to our rooms. All except my Dad. He had to stay and make sure everything was switched off. You know, for reasons 'n stuff!

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info