Humans structure music according to their mother’s heartbeat from the womb. Slow music makes us tired because slow heart rate means sleeping, and fast music in action movies makes us feel something is about to happen because she experiences a surge of adrenaline with fast beats.
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Most people who grow up in broken family systems don't realize their family is unusual. They adopt horrible behaviors that help them survive the broken system. Then they go out into the world and seek out people who match their behaviors. Then they build a second broken family.
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Most women who have to see their ex get dressed to the nines to show him what he's missing. Then she wonders why he's always trying to crawl back into her life. Don't do this. Dress like a slob. Forget bathing for a day or two. Disgust him. Watch him avoid you like the plague.
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You are better than your worst mistake that you still measure yourself by. The fact that you're still bothered by it proves you're better than you were then.
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You control exactly one half of every relationship. The best thing you can do at the start is make sure both sides operate in good faith. Good faith can help you overcome any problem together. Learn how to differentiate between good and bad faith actors for next time.
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