I remember saving up to finally buy my very first nice car. I beamed with pride every time I drove it. Three years later I had my first child. I walked him from the hospital, looked at my beautiful car, and whispered, “This is a death trap. My child is going to die.”
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My wife, who’d given birth to the child and was already overprotective, looked at me with her eyebrows raised. “You can drive faster you know.” Me, white knuckles creaking my steering wheel and veins bulging on my eyelids: “YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. WE LIVE IN A JUNGLE OF DEATH”
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I remember that first journey home from the hospital lol
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Me when Sprout was a month old: "If I move her arm wrong to put on this sleeper, t'will surely snap right off." 14 months later: "Neat, she likes being held upside down by her ankles!"
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