The modern push to make insecure people “love yourself first” is pushed by people who give up on any chance of being loved by others. Loving yourself first becomes a fallback to those who’ve surrendered to self-loathing. People need to feel loved first to see their own worth.
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Once a person learns what real relationships should look like and gets a working idea of boundaries they can find at least one friend anywhere. I usually recommend attending a class or group based on a shared hobby or religion so you instantly have something in common to discuss.
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But it must happen in that order or the insecure person will either shove away and flee from budding relationships, or destroy them with constant second-guessing until they exhaust themselves and confuse the other person.
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