The modern push to make insecure people “love yourself first” is pushed by people who give up on any chance of being loved by others. Loving yourself first becomes a fallback to those who’ve surrendered to self-loathing. People need to feel loved first to see their own worth.
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Worth in the eyes of others, to be truly loved, to learn to receive love and trust it will continue, allows one to finally raise a sword against the demons inside who whisper dark poisons in the lonely nights, who tell you your family was right to reject you.
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Instead of telling people to love themselves, we should teach people how love forms, how one is worthy of it, what a loved one expects, how to communicate openly, how to challenge fears, and how to help love thrive.
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It’s a hard road back from insecurity from attachment wounds, but learning to be loved by others and seeing your worth through their loving eyes is crucial to real lasting healing.
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