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I used to smoke, years ago, & my eldest son was obsessed with fishing the cigarette butts out of the ashtray & eating them. Nothing I said would stop him. Kids are weirdoes.
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I didn't smoke, but my son did that too anytime we were somewhere someone did smoke.
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Pfft. Once you get to "STOP LICKING YOUR BROTHERS PANTS!", Let me know.
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How about “is this poop or chocolate?”
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“Don’t handcuff your brother to the toilet again. Now go put some clothes on!” “Who said you could use the couch cushions to sumo wrestle on the trampoline in the rain?” (My own mother OKed that one.)
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Me "Why is there vomit on the ceiling?" Daughter "I missed the toilet"
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Wait until you get to the "Go put close on and stop barking at the neighbors, you're not a dog" stage.
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I never thought I'd have to yell and threaten to take a toy away for not eating.... Wait for it... A pizza slice
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