@TheBrometheus Your article on why passive-aggressiveness shreds social cohesion was really good.
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Replying to @ctlansdown
Thank you, bro. It’s good to talk about this stuff so folks understand what they’re seeing and how to stay safe. But also so folks can maybe heal themselves, too.
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Replying to @TheBrometheus
I've been fortunate enough to never encounter an alliance-forming passive aggressive person close-up, but I recognize the dynamic. Is interesting teaching my 10 year old to be forthright instead of passive aggressive.
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Replying to @ctlansdown @TheBrometheus
It's interesting because the reasons why are not simple; basically the case for forthrightness is "it may not work, but even if it doesn't it will generally fail better than being passive aggressive, which will work far less."
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Replying to @ctlansdown @TheBrometheus
But man was it hard to come up with examples of being passive aggressive when he asked for them (he asked for examples of both in the same situation to contrast them)!
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Replying to @ctlansdown @TheBrometheus
I suppose it's easy for those habituated to it, but I've spent so long operating under "if you want something, the answer may be 'no' but it doesn't hurt to ask, and if you don't ask you don't get".
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Replying to @ctlansdown @TheBrometheus
Once one learns that people don't mind requests that come with the explanation, "I didn't think it was possible, but I figured there's no harm in asking," there's no turning back!
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Replying to @ctlansdown @TheBrometheus
The other one I don't get is people who don't want others to know they're inexperienced. People treat one better if they know one is inexperienced! "I haven't done this before" is a ticket to understanding and sympathy.
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Lots of insecurity floating around our world right now. Attachment issues are on the rise. They don’t have to be full disorders to cause some minor issues.
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Replying to @TheBrometheus
Is insecurity primarily about social relationships rather than general suspicion one will fail? Like is it a feeling that a person is one mistake away from being rejected and cast out into the darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth?
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