Not only is niceness a false god. It’s one that’s impossible to please.
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I’d say it’s more of an attempt to extort love than earn it. “You have to love me. I was nice to you. If you don’t, that means you’re a bad person and I’m a victim”
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Ha! True, but that’s stage two. Then comes gossiping behind your back to earn love from others as a martyr. Last is devaluing and rejecting you before you can reject them.
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