Insecure parents treat adult kids like emotional indentured servants. They don’t feel compelled to earn respect, they feel entitled to it because of all they’ve provided over the years. That’s not a relationship. That’s emotional hostage taking. Do not be blackmailed or cowed.
Remember that you are raising adults who will enter the world and be expected to uphold law and morality. That they will have their own children someday. Invest in them as people but do not invest in outcomes, meaning teach useful skills but allow them to decide their paths.
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In all things ask what will make them a better adult. Use discipline versus punishment, teaching an appropriate lesson by leveraging consequence instead of inflicting pain to teach avoidance. In all things, ask what lesson you are teaching. Make sure it’s the right one.
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