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Prikvačeni tweetHvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi
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Hey guys, I am going to be in San Diego mid-March! What should I make sure to do? Also going with my girlfriend if you have any date/couple ideas!
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It’s only illegal to duel. It’s not illegal to challenge someone to a duel. Which is fine because I wasn’t going to remember to show up anyway. And I think forgetting you had an appointment to murder someone is probably more hurtful than actually murdering them.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
BALTHAZAR: We are the 3 Wise Men. MARY: I don’t think you can just call yourselves that. Like, I’ll decide if you’re wise. BALTHAZAR: No it’s our title. MARY: Who gave it to you? BALTHAZAR: MARY: BALTHAZAR: We did. MARY: Yeah that’s what I thought. I’ll just call you Bart.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
The Bible thought literal paradise was 2 people hanging out in a garden not eating fruit so maybe it doesn’t actually know all that much.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
Is no one going to talk about the tragedy of Mrs. Peanut? The pain of losing your husband, only to then have him reborn into a body which makes your love forbidden?
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[Watching halftime show] ME: I hope I look as good as Jlo when I’m 50. GIRLFRIEND: You don’t look that good now. ME: Yeah I’m not 50 yet.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
A little while ago I got to ask
@TheAndrewNadeau lots of questions about joke writing and he was incredible. You can listen on pretty much any music app or here:https://podcasts.google.com/?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9zY2llbmNlb2Z2aXJhbC5wb2RvbWF0aWMuY29tL3JzczIueG1s&episode=aHR0cHM6Ly9zY2llbmNlb2Z2aXJhbC5wb2RvbWF0aWMuY29tL2VudHJ5LzIwMjAtMDEtMjlUMTlfNTNfMTQtMDhfMDA …Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
A lot of people don’t watch the Super Bowl because they think not liking popular sports makes them look cool. Not me. I don’t watch it because I thought I saw a spider on my TV and I screamed and hit it with a chair.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
[friend gets me to watch star wars for the 1st time] "a long time ago..." wait, you didn't say this was a historical film? "in a galaxy far far away" about geography and astronomy? what is this, fuckin school
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Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi
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[Antiques Roadshow] APPRAISER: Well it’s not in very good condition. It looks like it hasn’t even been cleaned in awhile. How old is it? ME: I’m 33 and all of that hurt my feelings.
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MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
If you run out of pet names for your partner, just call them assorted baking ingredients: sugar, honey, cinnamon, vanilla, garlic powder, Montreal steak seasoning, butter, pumpkin.
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MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
Girl, are you a barnacle? Because you suck and I can't get you off my boat
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Just a reminder that nobody knew what was inside Willy Wonka’s factory when the contest happened. So people spent millions trying to find the golden ticket to witness what was most likely a standard assembly line operation.
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MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
*feels any pain between my shoulders and my pelvis* Oh god it's appendicitis
Prikaži ovu nitHvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
Commander: PILLAGE THEIR LANDS! SALT THEIR FIELDS! Me: [furiously shaking a salt dispenser on a potato] it's not working sir, it's just getting tastier
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MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
When you’re sad but there’s nothing specific wrong so your brain tries to come up with something to justify why you’re sad like “well you don’t have chips so—“
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi -
ME: Do you think Dory and Nemo were friends in real life? HER: What? How would—they’re cartoons. ME: No, obviously. I meant, like, the fish they were based off of.
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MehGyver proslijedio/la je Tweet
Is the quiz just the one question or...?pic.twitter.com/BymWdROGWL
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DAYTIME ANDREW: I am a smart, rational human being. NIGHTTIME ANDREW: I’m going to imagine a scenario where a person says something offensive to me and then get mad as if that person was real.
Hvala. Twitter će to iskoristiti za poboljšanje vaše vremenske crte. PoništiPoništi
Čini se da učitavanje traje već neko vrijeme.
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