Steve

PSA: don't buy other people pets as a gift unless they want it and are expecting it. Your giving them a moral and finical burden that can be several to dozens of years long.

I didn't buy my VR headset for porn, but hot dam, going back to regular porn is tough after experiencing slapping around 3D anime tiddies.

Does anyone know anything about caring for a betta fish? My boss bought me one for our new office and i want to spoil him.

Oh shit nevermind, Blizzard shit the bed again, i don't know why i expected any better from them at this point.

Oh shit thats right #Warcraft3 is out now, now to wait for Duke Wintermaul to return in remastered glory.

Moving on up, (hopefully) moving on out. Gonna be in Brentwood most days from now on, I'm officially a manager in training. Let's get this

How i know that was an off day, it is 8:17pm and i am pooping at night when i am strictly a morning dumper.

Major panic attack averted thanks to @RomanOtter almost thought I was going to have to deal with replacing a lost wallet for a little while there. Good luck with the suit!

The second i hear some boomer start blaming the youth for all their problems and how "he would have gotten it taken care of on his day" i go from helpful customer service, to get the fuck off my phone line customer service. Fucking boomers.

@Annedroooo You are the most difficult person to get along with, every time you open your small mouth i think "oh great, what stupid shit is he going to disagree with now"

@ashleyjayeaye you're the worst dancer i have never seen, and I've seen novice highschool duos. You move like a sloth that figured out they dont have to always be slow.

Hey @rdrsound the 80's called and they want your dumbass outfits back, stop dressing like cocaine is the thing to do.

@RomanOtter you have the worst taste in girlfriends, i hate every time i want to hang out and you're too busy pounding puss to text back, huma before tuna.

In contrast to @ashleyjayeaye compliment thread, i offer this: Like this tweet and i will reply with hurtful insults that are completely untrue but biting nonetheless.

One of my coworkers works just straight up doesn't like me and I'm not sure why, so I'm just gonna assume it's because she's no longer the hot young piece of ass in the office now that I'm here.