I do not bear false witness. She did not do the “best she could.” She was fun in public, cruel in private. She knew how to be nice.https://twitter.com/whodreamswho/status/1178329320194023425 …
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Sorry Stefan
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Thanks brother
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Just because they’re family, doesn’t mean you have to love them
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Don’t miss the opportunity to forgive her, whether it makes her self-reflective or not... you’ll award yourself the closure you may not yet be aware you may need. Mothers are our mainline to this life
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Some people are toxic to the end, and he could forgive her in his heart if he wants to, but a person should not be obligated by the creed of “family matters” to spend time with a hurtful person. It is often these well intentioned creeds they use to lure back their victims.
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That's sad, a mother especially should be the warm & comforting aspect of your life. Mine was not, she sounds a great deal like yours, but I do my best to be what I missed in my own childhood to my children. Not that mom won't bust you when you mess up, but there are always hugs.
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I have two wonderful grown children. When they were little if I wasn't sure what to do I would ask myself what my mother would do, and then I did the opposite. I am not kidding. Some people should never have children! She was an RN, so very cold in a way.
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Mine died in 2001 RIP. Well before I understood much about myself or why I am who I am. Not nearly as violent as your mom Stefan, I was born in 1964 and so much of what you relate about your life experience tracks mine. Thank you for opening my eyes.
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God bless you Stefan. I'm sorry for the abuse you endured and thankful you call out the lie, "they did the best they could."
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My Father taught me to Judge a person not just on what they do to you, but what they do to themselves, family, friends and strangers. If they treat themselves like crap, then they probably have a mental illness or perhaps don't know better. If it's selective then that's just bad
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That’s bad.
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Know how you feel. Mine was spiteful and cut me out of the will 3 days after my father died.
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Stefan has Mummy issues, call her
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It took me the better part of my life before I finally chose to stop living the lie. Like many abusive relationships, the pressure's of 'You should love this person because...' robbed me of years of the peace I have now finally found.
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It's hard to overstate the significance of that. Hearing you say that and thinking on it has added to my moral compass. Also have been able to help some friends cope more effectively with childhood trauma.
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Ahh, the ol' "best I could" BNAP. Drains a little of my soul, every time I hear it.
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