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Prikvačeni tweet
hi we are Sotheran's and we are a rare book store in London we've been around since 1761 before the united states were even a thing and our ghosts are so old they already retired our twitter account is usually on
the books are usually not
find us at http://sotherans.co.uk pic.twitter.com/a9NqoPRglc
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THERAPIST: and would you say that your obsessive acquisition of reading material is perhaps a form of coping mechanism ME: no that's ridiculous THERAPIST: ok well lets move on - tell me about your father ME: are these pamphlets free
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As a Level 5 bookseller I don't have access to the Blood Freezing Stare ability yet, but it's only a matter of time
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it comes quite high up on the Dramatic Bookstore Moments leaderboard, just after the time two Irish lads tried to use the print department as a pit fighting arena they were of course, quietly asked if they wouldn't mind very much sorting this all out elsewhere
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some people think bookselling is a low-skill profession but I once saw a (now deceased) colleague swoop down on a man who marched in screaming loudly about breasts, escort them with dignity off the premises AND hawk them a ceremonial bust of Dickens in under 2 minutes
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we only found out about them because we had a chap in to fix a light and he was asking if he could get into the crawlspace which we all fervently denied existed until he pointed out the hatch ...I hope there's nothing important up there.
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this bookshop has always been suspiciously free of vermin (apart from the Great Rot of 2014) which somehow makes me more nervous about any and all secret passages in case they formed a civilisation up there
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if you think your life is complicated, consider that two weeks ago we discovered no fewer than three ceiling hatches that no-one is quite sure where they lead to but also no-one wants to open them in case we meet one of those ferocious mutant London rats
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I'm not sure I'd want to meet some of them though. I suspect Mr Sotheran is still pretty mad about being run over by that tram
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I've always thought there would be a lot of mileage in hiring a medium to sit in one corner and channel whatever spirit we needed in the moment "Gertrude, I'm trying to find that copy of the Iliad, can you channel Brian and ask him what happened to it in the blitz"
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sometimes people come in and say "you aren't who I spoke to last time" with this air of confusion like no Mavis the last time you were here was just prior to the fall of Carthage we had to make one or two changes
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the other day someone came in asking if the bindery was open reader, the shop bindery closed before I was born I still apologized, naturally It seemed the polite thing to do
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There was one time a guy called in to pick up some books he left in 1990, he'd moved and hadn't been in contact since then but he assumed the books would "still be around" like yea maybe who knows
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people charge in like "I was given this note back in 1981 by a colleague of yours" and honestly I see no reason anyone would lie about that but also ma'am that's just a squiggle on a sweet wrapper
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so this bookstore has a long history and lots of staff have spent their working lives here, which means I spend a lot of time answering for the bookkeeping crimes of the dead like the world's most boring necromancer
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I mean all this really proves is that we really SHOULD have a separate shelf mark for heresy like I've been saying
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man comes in looking for a Confirmation (sort of a christian coming-of-age) present for his godson, so we give him a devout looking book but turns out book is not devout [oh no] book is a heretical play [oh NO] about how jesus was an idolatrous death-defying escape artist [help]
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on due reflection I have decided this is definitely a "live and let live" situation
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I want to go ask the vicar if he or she knows about it but I have a quiet and ever increasing concern that maybe she IS the vicar I'm not sure I could rest easy knowing she was out there holding her Jurassic mass every week under the watchful eye of antediluvian reptile corpses
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is this just one of those situations where I'm going to regret the answers or end up buying a gigantic set of t rex teeth because she hands them to me and I'm too british to say no
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but I feel like I need to ask this lady what possessed her to set up a necromantic market stall of ancient predator bones in a church, and why no-one involved seems to mind at all
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