Jesus Christ

@SonOfGodAndMan

God Jr.

Everywhere. But mostly Epcot.
Joined March 2015

Tweets

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    19 Sep 2018

    Look all I'm saying is give Satan a chance.

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  2. 7 hours ago

    I sure hope this subtweet is about some other Trinity

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  3. 8 hours ago

    who banged My mom: ⚪️ God ⚪️ Me ⚪️ Spooky ghost 🔘 All of the above

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  4. 8 hours ago

    Hey, Mario– women are equal to men and should be treated as such. It's not that hard. *Okey dokey*?

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  5. 9 hours ago

    I never buy alcohol– I just pay My water bill.

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  6. 9 hours ago

    You Daddamn right I'm a feminist, motherfucker.

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  7. 9 hours ago

    Nothing terrifies an insecure man like a more secure woman.

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  8. 11 hours ago

    80 thousand people disagree with you, Andrew

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  9. 12 hours ago

    Yo Heaven is so fucking boring on Friday nights– and all other nights

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  10. 13 hours ago

    It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. Mostly because the eye of a needle actually exists, but My point about most rich people being shitbags still stands.

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  11. Retweeted
    22 hours ago

    [end of the Sixth Day] GOD: It's missing something. The humans are too physically weak to defend themselves. ANGEL: {creating fire} How about this? GOD: I like it. What's your name, kid? ANGEL: Satan, Sir. GOD: Well this is the start of a beautiful friendship, Satan. SATAN:

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  12. 17 hours ago
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  13. 17 hours ago
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  14. 18 hours ago
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  15. 18 hours ago

    Hi I'm a high school bully in a movie. My shenanigans rapidly escalate as I commit assault, false imprisonment and attempted rape on the night of the Enchantment Under The Sea dance. I'm gonna grow up to be on good terms with the woman I tried to rape and wax her car. I look 34.

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  16. 18 hours ago

    Remember when God pranked Abraham into almost murdering his son to test how much Abraham loved Him? Lmfao 😂😂😂 Seriously though God is a stable genius

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  17. Retweeted
    19 hours ago

    this website rocks

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  18. 20 hours ago
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  19. 20 hours ago

    If he talks to Jesus that way, just imagine the messages he sends to women everyday

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  20. 22 hours ago

    [end of the Sixth Day] GOD: It's missing something. The humans are too physically weak to defend themselves. ANGEL: {creating fire} How about this? GOD: I like it. What's your name, kid? ANGEL: Satan, Sir. GOD: Well this is the start of a beautiful friendship, Satan. SATAN:

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  21. 24 hours ago

    New cover photo everyone

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