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  1. Retweeted
    Apr 28

    The Twitter bot replaces the word 'God' in Joel Osteen's Tweets with the phrase 'your dick.' It is the best bot of all time.

  2. Retweeted
    Apr 6

    The bigger you make your dick, the smaller your problems become and the more faith will rise in your heart.

  3. Retweeted
    Apr 24

    Keep being your best, living confident, expecting good things, and your dick will get you to where you’re supposed to be.

  4. Apr 28

    Hey , have you seen 's twitter? I think this is something you'll appreciate.

  5. Retweeted
    Apr 27

    wringing my dick out like a sponge and letting all that gray water drip all over my bluesuede shoes

  6. Retweeted
    Apr 27

    im not tipping any more waiters until the facts come in, regarding Putin

  7. Retweeted

    Michigan doctors charged in first federal genital mutilation case in US

  8. Retweeted
    Apr 23

    Jesus even with the gravy the beef still looks as dry as Ghandi's flip flops how is this possible?

  9. Retweeted
    Apr 23

    check out this little guy if you have never seen him. his name is mickey mouse and you can find him on any computer

  10. Retweeted
    Apr 21

    Show me a Nation with a science-hostile government, and I'll show you a society with failing health, wealth, & security.

  11. Retweeted

    I say this in all sincerity, without joy, and with malice towards one: fuck Bill O'Reilly.

  12. Retweeted
    Apr 19

    Fuck Bill O'Reilly

  13. Retweeted
    Apr 19

    So a man can't jack off on a phone call to a coworker and threaten her career if she complains? The PC Police have taken over at Fox News

  14. Retweeted
    Apr 12

    This picture made my day.... Rest well world. 🌏🔴

  15. Retweeted
    Apr 12

    We just lost one of the funniest most real brothers of all time . Charlie Murphy RIP.

  16. Retweeted
    Apr 12

    my loyal followers are calling me a "Pussy" because a car kicked up a piece of rebar or something and popped me inthe fucking teeth at 99mph

  17. Retweeted
    Apr 11

    With President Forrest Trump, every day is like a rancid box of chocolates. You never know what kind of shit you're going to get next.

  18. Retweeted
    Apr 11

    One to Sleep On: Release the past to rest as deeply as possible.

  19. Apr 10

    Without congressional approval. Way to go 45, ya cunt.

  20. Retweeted
    Apr 7

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