I'm becoming the designated Feminist Killjoy in my table read group, who points out that the male characters have descriptions but the women (who are all hookers) are just "hot", that the PoC character is the first to die, that the extended degrading graphic sex scene is a prob.
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A gentle suggestion, for anyone who finds themselves in this kind of conversation in any context: please take turns wearing the Killjoy hat. Don't leave the work to one person. If you find yourself the Designated Killjoy, ask for help.
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(A brilliant WoC writer has recently joined the group and I know she's really good on this stuff. I'm going to explicity ask her for help and see if we can sit across the room from each other so we can communicate by eye-signal.)
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Men (and other people with relative social privilege in any given situation), please educate yourself on these issues and be the one to speak first sometimes. The sad truth is your peers don't listen to me but they might listen to you.
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Most of what I get right in the world is because one way or another generous people shared with me what they know. It's a privilege to get to help other writers get representation/erasure/bias issues right. But it's hard work and exhausting and I can't do it alone.
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A friend's told me I'm not alone: there are other outspoken women in this group, but our attendance lately hasn't overlapped, and also the guys who are regulars are catching up and calling out more issues, too. I'm thrilled about all of this & more excited to go back as a result.
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End of conversation
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Oh my. This whole thread. Yes, being Designated Killjoy isn’t only exhausting, it’s also alienating.
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writer + friend of writers