I know I've positioned myself pretty squarely in opposition to the "no kink at pride" purity/respectability crusaders, but because Some People just HAD to take things too far, I find that I have to modify my stance.
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I am referring, of course, to all the goddamn trees that won't stop having public goddamn sex all over the place. Some of us have allergies, you inconsiderate jerks.
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They blew a load all over your face.
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didn't even buy me a drink first.
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This is partly the fault of planners who plant male trees because they're "cleaner" so they spooge excess pollen all over the place instead of it finding its way to the proper number of female trees!
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In your defense even the most kink-friendly prides frown on actively spanking it while you’re riding down the parade route
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then maybe they can have a word with the trees!
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Bradford pears even SMELL like cum
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