I said top 3, but I have more. Some of these are recommendations more than lessons:
4) Family is really important. If you have good parents, be grateful for them. Tell them you appreciate what they’ve done for you/taught you. Be specific.
Conversation
Spend time w/ your parents. Learn to talk to/see them as real people w/ their own complex emotions and goals. It may seem obvious, but I know very few people who treat their parents this way.
1
4
19
5) More generally, tell people what you admire/appreciate about them. Maybe even put it in writing so they can reread it whenever they want to feel good. This is probably one of the best gifts you can give someone you care about. It should bring you as much joy as it brings them.
1
2
6) Setting goals is pointless if you haven’t made yourself a person who is capable of accomplishing goals. Start small, build self-trust with things that feel basic or inconsequential (e.g. good sleeping habits, flossing, being on time), THEN worry about the bigger stuff.
1
1
2
The transition will feel easy/exciting once you’re ready for it. At this stage, if working on goals feels aversive, there may be something wrong (depends on the nature of the goal though, of course, sometimes being aversive is the point!)
1
7) Read about personal growth and listen to advice good people give you. Even if it feels critical, makes no sense to you right now, or doesn’t resonate with where you’re at, if it’s good insight it will click eventually.
1
When it clicks, you’ll have a huge advantage for implementing meaningful change since the ideas are already there for you to recall.
1
8) Avoid cynical people and people who make excuses for themselves or for you. Even if they mean well (claim to be protecting you), they will drag you down—sometimes subtly—and you may not notice yourself buying into their narrative. Don’t buy into it!