fart mid flight Spend the rest of the trip in the bathroom to avoid awkward stares from the guys in your row
Was gonna change seats in waiting area because woman was eating too loud. Pooted on the way up. Walked to different part of airport instead
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walked to entirely different airport, changed name and face, burned all my old credit cards
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Your twitter feed is the gift that keeps on giving
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mouthsmackers are the worst D:
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I think this is a metaphor for my entire life.
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