So I've been thinking of a little list of guidelines. If someone checks these boxes, I know it's time to ignore/avoid, or block if it's bad.
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Following these guidelines more strictly lately has made me feel very empowered and happy. So, without further ado:
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1) Aggressive, pushy behavior. Sending too many messages, invading my personal space, or expecting a lot of my time.
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2) Getting offended, mean, or acting hurt when I set reasonable boundaries.
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3) Getting too personal or prying into my personal life too much, especially when I'm being mostly professional or distant.
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4) Getting romantic or sexual in any way. I'm not here for that, I'm not looking for compliments, and I've been sexually harassed too much.
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5) Rude or mean comments- about me, other people, or even just about technical work. Even "brutally honest" comments. You can always be kind
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And if I get a bad feeling about someone or keep feeling bad after conversations, trust that. Identify the bad behavior & add to this list.
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Replying to @sehurlburt
I'd also add gaslighting to your list. Anyone who constantly undermines my perception of reality doesn't belong in my life.
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Replying to @JPalmerGD @sehurlburt
Broader than just gaslighting, any significant pattern of disingenuousness.
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That is, if they frequently say/do things that seem to be about getting your or other ppl's reactions rather than honest interest.
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