So you've admitted to sexually assaulting comedians in a work culture where fellow people of power took actions to keep the victims not working and quiet about the offenses so that you could make millions and keep working. HOW DO YOU ATONE FOR YOUR SINS? A THREAD OF SOLUTIONS.
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Atoning for Sexual Assault in Comedy Idea #1: Privately apologize to each of your victims.
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Atoning for Sexual Assault in Comedy Idea #2: Write letters and make phone calls to all of the comedy club bookers, hosts, waiters, agents, managers, tour managers, and fellow comedians who protected you to apologize to the survivors.
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Atoning for Sexual Assault in Comedy Idea #3: Take a full accounting of all the earnings these survivors missed had they hypothetically continued on their career trajectories without your enablers. Pay them that amount.
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Atoning for Sexual Assault in Comedy Idea #4: Take a full accounting of all the physical and emotional labor and services your survivors have had to pay for themselves or neglected because they couldn't afford it. PAY FOR THAT.
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Atoning for Sexual Assault in Comedy Idea #5: If these survivors are still performing comedy or even if they are not, ensure that they get jobs, shows, and stage time for as long as they need through your considerable network of gatekeepers.
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And for #3-5, setup the independent infrastructure to administer the funds and gatekeeping so that survivors do not have to have any interaction with you or pretend to accept your apologies to benefit.
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