Good morning Seinfeld fans and Happy Festivus everywhere! Today I'll have my annual #AiringofGrievances. Join me here throughout the day...
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@peterthiel is advising the President Elect. That's great. But his plan 2 make the Statue of Liberty into a digital stop sign is a bit much -
I know I've said a lot about
@AmbJohnBolton so you're probably expecting me 2 say something nice for the holidays. Nope.#AiringofGrievances -
My favorite Cabinet pick is what's his name, umm it's that guy who wanted to eliminate the Dept. of
@ENERGY. Hang on I'll think of it... -
New administration has some great people. But I wanna know who has to tell
@realdonaldtrump he can't build a golf course on the South Lawn? -
I've only just begun. I'll be back to talk waste, more gov grievances and nonbinding resolutions against my Senate colleagues
#HappyFestivus -
What do sea monsters, a superhero cartoon in Pakistan & gambling habits of Ugandans have in common? It's time for more
#AiringofGrievances! -
The national Park Service announced a grant 2 study “Knowledge, Experience and Beliefs of the Supernatural Environment.”
#AiringofGrievancespic.twitter.com/8XVRwhdKe3 -
I bet you didn't know the federal government is using $30,000 of your taxes to study Ugandan gambling practices.
#AiringofGrievancespic.twitter.com/OMbLtDxKTE -
The Department of State, is advertising a $1.25 million grant opportunity to produce a superhero cartoon in Pakistan.
#AiringofGrievancespic.twitter.com/Pyheyqa1mo
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Those are just a few examples. Our hard-earned money is wasted everyday while our citizens, vets & infrastructure suffer
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We’ve got a lot of problems w/ how our tax dollars are spent & you've only heard about some. But I'm not done yet...http://bit.ly/2h9Ob71 pic.twitter.com/KZKJYiI2Xk
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For those of you "media" writing serious stories about my Festivus jokes, I don't even know what to say, just stop...
#AiringofGrievancespic.twitter.com/Fvw6nKbGp8 -
Speaking of fake drama, this administration is the first to include 2
@WWE hall of famers. My grievance is, why isn't Mean Gene press sec? -
I'm very sorry to have been the one to tell
@jackhunter74 pro wrestling is not real in that last tweet. -
Also, for those who think
@WWE is real, I'm very sorry Bernie Sanders lost. -
Of course here in our own office my adviser
@dougstafford thinks the@nyjets are real too. I can't convince him or Woody otherwise... -
Sticking with sports for a minute, I have an idea for
@HBO: hard knocks, congressional baseball version. -
They follow as a bunch of old guys who didn't play ball in college attempt to not break themselves each year for charity
#AiringofGrievances -
Great, now I'm proposing reality shows too. The new environment in DC is catching...
#AiringofGrievancespic.twitter.com/m8QfTN8Zf9 -
I'm grateful you've followed along with me today as in last years. I try to have fun sometimes. This town needs it.
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I'll be celebrating Christmas with my family this weekend. We wish you a merry Christmas if you are too.
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If you only celebrate Festivus, enjoy today and I hope you win the feats of strength later. I've been practicing...
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I decided I'd take on someone who thought he was a tough guy. Bring it,
@SenatorReid#featsofstrengthpic.twitter.com/RzwWeLnXPx
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I was gonna pick Mitch, but every time I tried to bring it up the Capitol Police kept getting twitchy. Sorry guys.
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A few years ago I complained that my colleague
@CoryBooker didn't retweet me enough. Apparently he can't take a hint.#AiringofGrievances -
On a positive note, since that exchange
@CoryBooker & I have worked on many criminal justice bills, proving Festivus brings us all together. -
My other colleagues
@SenMikeLee &@SenTedCruz are rumored to be on the Supreme court short list.@survivorcbs is gonna be so nerdy this year -
But I'm upset VP & cabinet wasn't picked w/ a reality show. I would have watched. You would have too, don't deny it.
#AiringofGrievances -
I'm gonna have to stop tweeting about Festivus soon,
@FoxNews just asked me to come on & talk about my own personal#WaronChristmas. Rude. -
For the folks at
@MSNBC, that was a joke. - 5 more replies
New conversation -
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