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  1. hoping to have sex (the regular, average kind) soon

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  2. Basically I have to decide between sending nudes to a drummer who will just reply “rad” or a lawyer who will be like “wow! This rocks. Thanks for taking the time to send this to me.”

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  3. Telling women not to pit women against each other is just another example of “the man” telling us what we cannot do...sad

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  4. Whenever my nails are done I feel like regular texting counts as emailing does this make sense

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  5. I always joke about asking guys to come murder me but I want to be clear that if one actually did I wld be bummed out, pissed even

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  6. This is what it looks like everytime I tweet

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    ohhhh so when centrists said the US would turn into venezuela if bernie won they meant they would interfere w the election. i think people misunderstood them. we owe them an apology

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  8. If you can’t take a leotard off of a girl you don’t deserve to have sex

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    3. velj
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  10. An adult woman shld have 5 best friends, one of them male, and 2 boyfriends (one creative, one non-creative)

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  11. My best friend is a Taurus and I’m a Virgo. We’re staying together rn and her morning routine is like...stretching, meditating, washing her face with oils and mine is like waking up screaming and checking my email while I try to shit

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  12. I’m a New York girl but if I was gonna get murdered it’d be in LA

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  13. Guys will always be like “you used me for content” after they’ve used you for sex

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  14. Not sure what kind of lawyer the lawyer I’m dating is but he lives in Brooklyn not Manhattan so I know it’s not too evil

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  15. I don’t have time to explain why but when I sext the lawyer I’m seeing I’m saving lives

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  16. The best part of having a boyfriend is saying “good job baby” when he does something like park the car or buys a Keurig

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  17. my heart literally melts when a guy hangs something on his wall

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  18. I’m driving in a car and it’s amazing...I love experiencing and enjoying LA culture

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  19. Guys love it when you text them “you did it” after their team wins the Super Bowl

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  20. I’m not watching the Super Bowl but I’m in the same room as it

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