Haven't done a tweetstorm in a while. This time, I'm going to venture out of my comfort-zone & talk about a subject I don't know much about. It's in response to the devastating terrorist attack in Toronto of 4/23 & toxic masculinity.https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/25/raw-hatred-why-incel-movement-targets-terrorises-women …
2nd of all: what is the role of the rabbi as the transmitter of Jewish values in social discourse? Although I'm a sociologist also, I am not an expert on toxic masculinity, Incel or this particular case involving the suspect, Alek Minassian. /3
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A rabbi *always* takes a risk by discussing issues outside their expertise, but the greater risk is not to; thereby abdicating our responsibility to bring the light of Torah to the world as teachers of Torah & as pastors. Torah speaks to many situations, including this one. /4
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It looks like suspect was connected to Incel ('Involuntary Celibacy') communities online. What is it about gender-relationships today that some people experience as unsettling? How can we empower women & include men? How do Jewish values play out in this discussion? /5
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Gen. 1:27 is clear: humanity is created 'male/female' (zachar/nekevah') which I read as typologies rather than essentialist realities, & humanity is created equally in Image of God. Eve is 'ezer k'negdo', a strong helper opposite Adam as cited in Gen. 2:18. /6
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So we learn that there should be balance/respect/equality between sexes/genders. But we also learn something else in Gen. 2:18: 'it is not good for humankind to be alone.' We live in society of crushing loneliness/alienation & can be tempting to flee into gender essentialism. /7
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Incel, or any other kind of bigotry/hatred = symptom of root cause & expression of systemic discrimination. We still live in a society w/so many intersecting & confusing forms of discrimination. We live in a time of great change/flux/challenge. We live in an era of loneliness. /8
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We need to break down structural discrimination AND we need to model new models of human relationships, love & identity. Gender may be social construct, but it is 1 that defines us, sometimes in extreme & painful ways. How can we reframe the roles of women, men & non-binaries? /9
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What is our response to toxic masculinity? It cannot be to condemn men, nor can it be to deflect male responsibility. We must stand w/men of good will, love & sensitivity. Must create space for men to develop a multilayered, nuanced, diverse & emotionally deep sense of self. /10
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We must break existential loneliness AND look to our Torah as a model: both in how to be & how *not* to be (there's toxic masculinity in Torah too). Bible has strong women & vulnerable men. Men & women are warriors, mystics, teachers, artisans, poets, lovers, spouses etc. /11
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The solution to 'Incel'/toxic masculinity is to broaden definitions while recognizing people's yearning for connection, relationship, responsibility. Encourage the men in your lives to love, cry, parent, be vulnerable, dream, talk... We can all do this. /12
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When I cuddle my son (& daughter), & praise my husband for the formidable task of being stay-at-home-dad, we are reframing conversations about who we are. The Torah is here to remind us that we are human beings, not human doings, neither angels nor beasts. /13
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We can live in the richness of sacred relationships. Men, like women, are lonely & hurting. Men, like women, need new models of how to be & lead in the world. Men, like women, need permission to feel & courage to talk. Let's bless each other & wipe bigotry from the earth. /END
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