part of the claim as i understand it is that you actually do - there's a sort of P vs. NP claim that if you're capable of recognizing good parenting then you must have a copy of good parenting in your system somewhere to compare it to
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in the attachment repair course we were given actually a description of what an ideal parent is supposed to do which i found surprisingly helpful. here are the "five elements of secure attachment" (i was most surprised by "unconditional support for exploration")
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i also found reading the beginning of preconquest consciousness inspirational
ranprieur.com/readings/preco
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i bring them every objection i have to the practice, it's a whole thing 😅
good luck with all this 🙏
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