so i have a question why are you all always trying to “coach” and “mentor” each other?
have you ever tried just having friends and acquaintances and listening to their stories and offering your perspective?
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to me it seems like resilient relationships of mutual concern will outperform illusory clout of monetizing / professionalizing friendship but maybe i’m a sentimental old wizard
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I totally want to sign up for all of yalls patreon/substack/bandcamp &c — but I just want a world where everybody doesn’t have to have a hustle
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i mean look to be clear i’m not going to tell yall how i make money but it’s not pretty — my life is riven with internal contradictions — if you’ve got a grift that works i respect that, it’s all any of us can ask in this vale of tears
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my point is do we really have to hurl ourselves headfirst into relations of mutual exploitation?
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don't like this, don't agree that "coaching" or "mentoring" is inherently exploitative. it's just a different kind of conversation. i make different moves when i explicitly adopt a "coaching" frame with a friend and sometimes those moves accomplish a lot
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i've offered free coaching to multiple friends, on multiple occasions helped friends cry about wounds involving their parents they hadn't been able to access themselves, on one occasion helped a friend deal with acute pain using IFS
it's not a substitute for the friendship it's just a different thing we can do within the friendship. i explicitly put myself away temporarily in order to make more room for them, then i come back
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