i recently finished rewatching all of brooklyn 99 and there's a specific sad feeling i get from it that is like... the characters in that show individually have huge flaws but they don't need to completely fix them because the other characters naturally compensate for them
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amy starts out neurotic and in many ways stays neurotic, charles starts out... uh... charles and in many ways stays charles, jake starts out happy-go-lucky and impulsive and actually grows up a lot but never completely loses that spark
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everyone grows into their strengths while balancing out each other's weaknesses. and i don't know that i've ever been in a social environment that i felt worked like this 😕
mostly because i think i congregate in places where other people have the same weaknesses as me 😅
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there's maybe something a little troubling about how the internet makes it very easy to spend all your time interacting with people who are as similar to you as possible. they understand you better, but the flipside is they have a harder time balancing you out
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my college fraternity is probably the closest i came to this. my best friend there was an extremely outgoing gay black man and he balanced out my shyness a lot in a way i really appreciated. went to a lot of parties with that guy 🥲
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I've had a similar idea in the back of my mind, vague sense that maybe part of what's gone wrong is this impulse that everyone needs to be complete within themselves and fully coherent
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most people simply pick up strategies to get by in their environment, and only make them cohere as much as they're forced to
think trying to attain total coherence is a trauma mode; and wondering if society's increasing universal demand for it is a lateral or net negative move
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I'm not quite sure what the viable alternative is, because the counterfactual of not holding people to account for things that don't make sense could be way worse
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Good reminder for me why I should stay connected and involved with my ultimate frisbee teams and friends
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Au contraire, time to quit and join doily club
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