The time wasn't spent in this proactive form of spiritual work that I've personally engaged in at earlier points in my life, and sometimes still. The time was spent in mourning over the prior relationship, appreciating myself in isolation, and pushing myself in new ways.
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Having a schedule I set all on my own. Achieving a high level of fitness. Doing exactly as I willed and having the capital to do so. I learned I wanted more from life than what I'd previously accepted.
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I thought I was okay with very little. I learned I am okay with very little. I am not okay with the limits poverty places on my time and autonomy, nor the limits it places on the resources at my disposal for the projects I wish to undertake & the experiences I need to grow.
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I enter a new phase of hunger.
Exiting quarantine I attained a bartending position at the hotel I worked at and achieved a paycheck which was similar to what I was earning from the government. I had a base. I could save a tiny bit every month from my own labor. This was new.
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I was made to move, suddenly. I moved to a beautiful house in a beautiful neighborhood with roommates I appreciated, through a mixture of fortune and choice. This was new.
I was provided a part-time job that paid as much as my hotel gig for 15 hours' labor a week. This was new.
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For the first time in my life I had Enough Money. I could save some, and I could buy myself the tools I needed to live properly. A nice coat. A suit for a wedding. A new computer to replace the 7 year old laptop I'd been writing on that was literally falling apart.
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Ultimately it gave me the experience I required to get my present job, where I'll be writing and settling questions for a prediction market, a job I quite like.
A job that will see me live abroad, something I'd wanted to do since childhood but never really had the means to do.
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Writing is an interesting choice in hobby. It means that no experience isn't worth having. Pain, intense pain, pleasure, boredom, the quotidian. Writing is meaning-making, and all experiences can be given meaning, and can give meaning. The days pass and I become more.
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I look forward to a powerful well of experience over the coming years, a new kind of prosperity and a new host of problems, and the ability to understand new people in new ways, that I might write better grapple with the nature of humanity and my shifting self.
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I deeply, earnestly wish to thank each of you who have played a role in my life so far, and look forward to growing with you all.
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