there are very much people who are going to work the opposite way, but speaking just for myself, i'm a little sad when people take my saying no to invitations too seriously
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the people in my social circles tend to be really big on respecting each other's stated preferences and, particularly since we are all various levels of ADHD and fucked up, respecting each other's "no i would rather not do this thing / go to this event rn"
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there are things i like about this - i like that we try not to *shame* people for having these preferences - but also like. i wanna be drawn out of my shell sometimes. when i'm withdrawing and saying no to everything i want someone to barge in anyway
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like i have a lot of preferences actually and some of them happen to be much harder to verbalize when i'm feeling really bad and, although it feels a little embarrassing to be this explicit about it, i want someone to read my mind about those
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"If she had to ask for everything, how could she get anything that she did not know how to ask for?"
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i can't think of a specific example but there's an anime trope where a sad character is holed up in their room, curled up in a dark corner, and their friend / crush barges in and literally drags them out into the sunlight, and like... that would be nice sometimes y'know 🥲
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dudes rock 🥲