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yep 3/5 of my adopted siblings have reactive attachment issues in the same manner absolute nightmare, people within the range of normal attachment are not equipped to parent these kids effectively at all for some reason I've always thought would do well with them
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the behaviors are so weird and crazymaking for the caretakers not to blame the kids, of course, it makes sense that this would be adaptive for them but it *feels* like you're being masterfully and antagonistically manipulated into going insane
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