this get's really fucking intense, and i'm awestruck by Dr. K's ability to stick in it and non-judgmentally give as much help as he can
Conversation
when this guy started talking about what his relationship with his wife was like, i was like "bro you're FUCKED", and Dr. K just rolled with it
"rolled with it" isn't quite right. more like, i can feel how he triggered in me a mode that's not conducive to listening
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like... what he shared pattern matched so many red-flags I know that I glitched into an abstract realm fixating on the BADNESS of everything,
which is exclusionary to sitting with "k, concretely, how is the causing hurt in their relationship, and what can be done?"
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oooooh shit. this is... social punishment guilt by association brain? it's me getting triggered, not from "this dude will hurt me", but "I expect others will attack this dude, he has a big red X of 'BAAAAD' on his back, oh fuck, i'm near him, no no no i'm not with this guy!"
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tectone: "I try to minimize the amount others can infer from what i say, i think really fast to figure our if I saw X they'll think Y"
dr k: when you're doing that, are you playing a single player game or multiplayer?
tectone: single player...
😭💔😭
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wait this is TECTONE? now i have to watch this
As someone who watches his, it's pretty eye opening. Seeing how his past has affected him and understanding him better