acidQC said - the rest of these have been paraphrases but this one is a direct quote:
"your parents created a world for you where the most real thing was how they felt about you. they successfully used money to make everything else less real by protecting you from it"
Conversation
and like i kinda get why they did that but it led to me being incredibly sheltered in a bunch of ways. they never even made me do chores. i was very spoiled and in retrospect it wasn't good for me
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anyway i could keep going a lot of stuff came up but i feel like i successfully resolved a big confusion that was preventing me from making progress on my life and that feels nice. i feel like i am a little bit more confronting the "actual stakes" wrt money
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the stakes are that the less money i make the harder it'll be for my parents to retire. my dad literally told me that. he said he was holding off on retiring because he was worried about me
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a few days later i wrote:
"this was never like... this was never a one-player game, it was always a multi-player game and i spawned already in a guild containing my parents who had already been playing for 30 years"
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the other stakes are about dignity. acidQC said "you need dignity much more than you need money" and that sort of blew me away a little. like... shit
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like when i explain my current life circumstances to myself in a matter-of-fact way it does not look good. i literally have no job, no gf, no friends (in the sense of people i interact with irl regularly), no community, no mission, no purpose, no team, no religion...
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i have 8k followers on twitter tho 😅 hi everyone
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anyway in conclusion i asked acidQC what i should do with my life and he said "literally just keep writing" and "you're literally allowed to just keep writing you literally don't have to have a plan for how the rest of your life goes that's any more detailed than that"
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By the time I got to the end of this thread where you said “I have no purpose” (& the fact that you just wrote & wrote on acid), I literally said out loud “Clearly writing is your purpose!!!” & the acid confirmed. ☺️☺️ You’re a Great writer, keep it up!
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