i sort of regret using the word "trauma" so much on twitter in the past, i ran into friction as a result which i think partly came from assuming "trauma" involves really *bad* experiences. the thing i want(ed) to talk about is more about really *confusing* experiences
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confusing as in "what did this mean? was this good? was this bad? which parts of this were good or bad? what even is meaning? what even are goodness and badness?"
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Modern man has had too many experiences.
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gaslighting is a particularly pernicious example because it involves someone else actively trying to confuse you but lots of other kinds of experiences can be confusing. often experiences are confusing when they happen too *fast*
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you start a whirlwind romance and it ends before you've even gotten a handle on how it began. you start a company and it takes off faster than you can adjust and then it crashes and burns or whatever. you uh. go to burning man and do drugs with your cult or y'know, whatever
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it's not exactly about pain and suffering. the sound of confusion is less "ow" and more "what the fuck? no, seriously, what the fuck?"
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unannealed discordant disconsonance, like a splinter in the body/mind emanating miscues like bremsstrahlung whenever something interacts with it,
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the single-crystal turbine blade has reached enlightenment
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i don't know what that is but yes